Still Living at Home in My 20s.

How did I end up back at home with my parents? Why can't I just move out already? Sometimes it feels like I’m running in circles, constantly wishing for something better and getting stuck in the same place.

The Balancing Act of Living at Home:

It’s funny to think about now, but I’ve spent the last 12 months living at home with my parents, regularly venting about how much I disliked my situation. I look back now with my head down and arms raised in surrender because, in hindsight, I let those negative feelings overshadow everything. The irony of it all isn’t lost on me. I spent so much time resenting my life at home, but now I’m realizing it was never really “home” or my parents that were the problem. If anything, they were the heroes of this chapter—always welcoming me back with open arms, regardless of the mood or attitude I showed up with. And that’s when it hit me.

Living at home as a young adult often feels like walking a tightrope between wanting independence and appreciating the safety net our parents provide. It’s unsettling, isn’t it? Whether you’ve never moved out or, like me, you moved back after university, it’s easy to feel like you’re falling behind because society tells us we should “move out,” “build independence,” and “stand on our own two feet.” And yes, while these ideas hold value, I wonder—could there be a kinder way to view this stage of our lives?

From Resentment to Renewal: Embracing the Lessons of Coming Home:

In my case, I moved out at 18 for university, and the freedom tasted so sweet. But freedom, as I learned, comes with its own challenges. After graduating, I clung desperately to the idea of staying independent. I went to such lengths, that I accepted a graduate job I didn't particularly want, just because I thought it would fund my dream of living out of my house and continue revelling in this young adult lifestyle of freedom and independence. I made compromises, like moving into a house with leaks and creaking stairs, with five other guys, expecting this was the best I could get all to prove to myself that I could do it.

But life doesn’t work on the timelines we imagine, does it?

Eventually, I ended up right back where I started—at home with my parents. And for a while, I treated it like a setback, refusing to see the beauty of this phase. It took quitting my job and re-evaluating what I wanted to realize something important: being back home wasn’t a failure. It was a chance to regroup, gain perspective, and practice balance.

And balance, I’ve learned, is key.

Why Am I Still Living at Home in My 20s?

Living at home as an adult doesn’t have to mean losing your independence. It can mean redefining it—bringing your newfound sense of freedom and maturity back into the house and learning how to set boundaries, respect your parents’ perspectives, and still nurture your goals. When you approach it this way, you might even find it liberating—more liberating than stubbornly clinging to an idea of independence just for the sake of it.

No Timeline, No Problem:

Society loves to push the idea of a “timeline” that we all must follow: move out at 18, have a career by 25, buy a house by 30. But this kind of thinking is paralyzing. It keeps us stuck in situations we don’t even enjoy, just so we can feel like we’re keeping up... with this imaginary life journey filled with levels and ranks we're constantly running towards. But here’s the thing—there is no timeline.

How can there be, when every single person’s journey is unique? Life is unpredictable, and that’s what makes it beautiful. When we stop clinging to rigid plans and instead embrace the unknown, we create space for possibilities we might never have imagined. Sure, the road ahead may not be clear, but isn’t that the exciting part?

So, if you’re living at home in your 20s, know this: it doesn’t mean you’re failing. It doesn’t mean you’re stuck. It’s simply one chapter in your story and there’s so much to be gained from it if you let yourself pause, reflect, and learn.

And who knows? Maybe the detours we fear the most are the ones that lead us exactly where we need to go.